Business 101 – Ask for the Referral. Get the Reward

Here’s one of my favorite business strategies. I don’t solely rely on it. But I like it a lot. 

One of the simplest and most effective ways to grow your business is to ask for a referral.

I know, I know, you’ve heard this before. But if you’re like most business owners, you’re either not asking at all, or you’re doing it the wrong way. And by “wrong,” I mean sending out some generic, mass email begging for referrals like a kid shaking down the neighborhood for cookie sales.

That’s not how you build a loyal customer base. That’s how you get ignored.

Here’s the cool thing: Your best clients want you to succeed. They’re already fans of your business. And just like sports fans who convince their friends to start rooting for their favorite team, your best clients will happily refer you, if you ask the right way.

Even better, when you get a referral, you already have people you know in common, which creates a better relationship earlier.

Let’s break this down.

Step 1: Identify your top three customers

Not every customer is worth asking. Some are just okay. Some are high-maintenance nightmares you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy. But some? The top tier? They are gold. These are the people who:
– Love what you do and wouldn’t dream of working with anyone else.
– Pay on time, no hassle.
– Sing your praises to anyone who will listen.

These clients already think you’re amazing. So when they refer someone, they’re not just helping you, they’re building their own reputation as someone who knows the best in the business.

Step 2: Pick up the phone (Yes, really.)

I get it. Calling people can feel awkward. But this is not some cold sales pitch. This is a thank you call with a bonus.

Here’s what you say:

“You’ve been such an incredible client, and I just want to say thank you. I want to selectively grow my business with people just like you. Since good people know good people, is there someone you would suggest I connect with?”

Then shut up and listen.

Seriously. No awkward filler. No nervous rambling. Just let them think.

One of two things will happen:
1️. They’ll instantly have someone in mind and make the intro. Boom—new lead.
2. They’ll say they can’t think of anyone right now. That’s totally fine—because now, the idea is planted in their head. When the right person pops up, they’ll remember you.

Step 3: Don’t sound desperate.

Desperation is the fastest way to kill a referral opportunity. That’s why mass “PLEASE REFER US!!!” emails don’t work. They reek of “We’re struggling and need business NOW.”

People want to refer winners. They want to be associated with a company that’s thriving—not one that’s gasping for air.

So, instead of begging, position your ask as an exclusive opportunity.

“I’m looking to grow strategically with amazing clients like you.”

See the difference? You’re not desperate—you’re selective. And that makes people want to help you.

Make referring you easy to do.

When someone says, “Yeah, I know the perfect person for you!”—don’t make them figure out the next step.

Offer to send a quick email they can forward.
Give them a link to your website with a referral form.
Ask them to CC you in an intro email.

Make it frictionless. The easier it is, the more likely they’ll follow through.

The payoff: stronger client loyalty

Here’s the unexpected bonus: Asking for a referral deepens loyalty with your existing clients. Because now, they’re personally invested in your success. When they refer someone to you, they’re not just helping you, they’re proving their own good taste in business partners.

It’s the same psychology that makes people feel more connected to a sports team when they convince their friends to become fans. When your top clients refer someone, they become even more loyal to your business.

Want to go deeper? Read these:

For those of you who love a good playbook, here are the exact chapters in my books that will help you master the referral game:

The Pumpkin Plan (Ch. 7, pgs. 111–130) – How to identify and focus on your most profitable clients.
Profit First (Ch. 6, pgs. 120–126) – Aligning your best clients with sustainable profitability.
Fix This Next (Ch. 3, pgs. 54–89) – Strengthening your sales relationships in the right order.
Get Different (Ch. 6, pgs. 151–174) – How to stand out and make your referral request unforgettable.

Final thought: If you don’t ask, the answer is always no.

You deserve more dream clients. They’re out there, you just need the right people to introduce you.

Now go get those referrals.

– Mike