An Interview with Executive Coach, Author, and Podcaster Melody Wilding

Finding success in your career is about so much more than skills and strategy. According to Melody Wilding, everything changes when you master the art and science of both influencing others and managing your own inner world. Melody is an award-winning executive coach, human behavior professor, and author of the new book, Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge. For the last 13 years, she’s used her background as a former therapist to help professionals at top companies worldwide discover their professional power position – that sweet spot where confidence and influence at work come together.

“Self-care isn’t just about bubble baths and meditation apps. For me, it’s about making strategic decisions that protect my energy.”
– Melody Wilding

Takeaways:

Melody’s journey began as a therapist noticing that her highest-achieving clients were brilliant at their jobs but battling intense self-doubt and overthinking, which resonated with her own experience as a sensitive professional in the corporate world.
Instead of seeing sensitivity as a liability, she discovered that being highly attuned helps professionals notice things others miss, like unspoken power dynamics and decision-making patterns that influence workplace success.
She built her business by writing specific, tactical content that addressed real situations no one was talking about
Her new book “Managing Up” took three years and four complete rewrites because she was determined to break down invisible workplace dynamics that everyone feels but no one had previously articulated.
Melody is driven by the fact that people spend 70% of their lives at work, making it crucial to help them reclaim their confidence and control in these relationships that have such an enormous impact on daily well-being.
Through her own experience in male-dominated environments, she learned that small language changes (like replacing “I’m sorry to bother you” with “Thank you for your time”) can dramatically shift how others respond to you.
You don’t need to change your personality to be taken seriously. Instead, you need to learn how to package your natural warmth and empathy in a way that commands respect.

Can you start by introducing yourself and telling us in your words, about your inspiring story?

While working as a therapist, I kept noticing something fascinating: many of my highest-achieving clients were struggling with the same patterns. They were brilliant at their jobs but battling intense self-doubt. They were rising in their careers but constantly overthinking every decision. They looked successful on paper but felt like imposters behind closed doors.

That’s when it hit me – I had been one of those people too! As someone who felt things deeply and thought about everything intensely, I had my own journey learning to navigate the corporate world without losing myself in the process. I wanted to help other professionals like me see their thoughtfulness and sensitivity were not a curse. In fact, being highly attuned helps you notice things others miss – like when you pick up on the unspoken rules of how decisions are made or you notice that your manager responds best to data and details, so you adjust your pitch accordingly – and get better results.

Fast forward to today, and I’ve had the privilege of helping thousands of professionals through my books “Trust Yourself” and “Managing Up” as well as my programs and courses. My career has been dedicated to giving people science-backed, practical tools to transform their work life for the better – whether they’re learning to confidently negotiate with senior executives, set boundaries in an “always on” environment, or quiet that inner critic that says they’re not ready for the next big opportunity. I’ve seen time and time again that once you understand the psychology of the workplace (yourself included!), everything changes. You stop second-guessing yourself so much, start commanding respect more naturally, and you can finally achieve success on your own terms

How did you market your business when it was brand new?

From day one, I knew I wanted to cut through all the generic “just be confident!” career advice out there since I had seen that fall when people were dealing with real workplace challenges. So I started writing articles that tackled the messy, specific situations no one was talking about – like how to handle a passive-aggressive colleague who undermines you in meetings, or what to actually say when pushing back on a micromanaging boss.

I focused on creating content that was incredibly tactical, which caught the attention of big publications and readers alike. People could tell I wasn’t just recycling the same old workplace tips. I was giving them practical tools they could use in their next meeting or email, which built a lot of trust.

Every article I wrote came from questions my clients were asking or challenges I saw them facing. That authenticity and specificity helped my business grow organically through word-of-mouth and readers sharing my work with their networks.

How do you prioritize self-care and well-being while managing the demands of your business?

I’ll be honest – as someone who teaches others about managing stress and emotions in the workplace, I’ve had to learn this lesson the hard way more times than I care to count. Early in my business, I fell into the trap of thinking I needed to be “always on” to be successful. I was responding to client emails at midnight, saying yes to every opportunity, and constantly feeling like I should be doing more.

Now I’m much more intentional about my boundaries. For example, I block off full days for deep work – no calls, no appointments, just time to think and create. I’ve learned that my best ideas and content come when I give myself this space to process and reflect.

I also pay attention to my energy levels. Being an entrepreneur means wearing many hats, but not all tasks affect us the same way. I know that back-to-back meetings drain me, so I limit those to certain days and build in recovery time. I have in mind tasks that I can do on “lower energy” days so I’m still productive even when I’m not feeling 100%.

But here’s what I want to emphasize: self-care isn’t just about bubble baths and meditation apps. For me, it’s about making strategic decisions that protect my energy. Sometimes that means turning down opportunities that look great on paper but don’t align with my bigger goals. Other times it means investing in support, like hiring a team member to handle tasks that consistently stress me out.

What would you consider your biggest accomplishment and why?

Writing two books! I’m particularly proud of my new book, Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge. This book breaks down the invisible power dynamics at work that everyone feels but no one could quite articulate before now. Instead of vague advice like “come with solutions, not problems,” it gives you word-for-word scripts for exactly what to say when your boss keeps changing priorities, how to push back when another project gets dumped on your plate, and much more.

We will spend nearly 70% of our lives at work, often spending more time with our bosses and colleagues than our own families. These relationships have an enormous impact on our daily well-being, yet the advice out there is frustratingly surface-level. I wanted to change that. I wanted to create a practical playbook that helps people master the actual human dynamics that determine their success at work.

What makes me most proud is seeing how this book helps people reclaim their sense of confidence and control. Every time I get a message from a reader saying they finally feel calm walking into a difficult conversation with their boss, or they’ve stopped second-guessing every email, I know those three years and four complete rewrites were worth it.

What challenges have you faced in the workplace, especially your experience in male-dominated environments?

I’m naturally warm and collaborative in my communication style. I used to start emails with “I just wanted to…” and pepper my speech with “sorry” and “maybe.” Early in my career, especially in male-dominated environments, I found it jarring to deal with more dominant personalities who were curt or direct. I’d take it personally when someone gave one-word responses or didn’t match my friendly tone.

But I realized that I was teaching people how to treat me. Every time I prefaced an idea with “Could I possibly share something?” or apologized before giving feedback, I was undermining my own authority. The people around me weren’t going to take me more seriously than I took myself.

The shift started with small changes in language. Instead of “I’m sorry to bother you,” it became “Thank you for your time.” Rather than “I just wanted to check if maybe…” it became “I have a recommendation.” Instead of “Could I share an idea?” it became “Here’s what I suggest.”

When I started showing up differently, how others responded to me changed, too. When I stopped qualifying my expertise, people stopped questioning it. When I learned to be direct without being harsh, I got more respect without losing who I was.