Body-Positive Activist Dr. Rachel Millner is on a Mission to Become a Plus-Size Peloton Instructor

Rachel Millner, Psy.D., nearly died from an eating disorder before becoming a body-positive activist and setting out on a mission to become a plus-size Peloton instructor. Going from valuing thinness above everything else to being proud and unapologetic in a plus-size body has not been easy, but it has been worth it. Rachel thought that gaining weight and being in a plus-size body was the worst thing that could ever happen to her. It turns out that it was the best. 

Takeaways:

• Rachel Millner is ready to break down walls and take up space as a plus-size Peloton instructor
• Rachel Millner has had to overcome significant challenges to get to where she is today, and she is now a well-known body-positive activist, psychologist, and determined to become a Peloton instructor

Rachel Millner, Psy.D.

“I thought that gaining weight and being plus size was the worst thing that could ever happen to me. It turns out it was the best.” -Rachel Millner

Can you start by introducing yourself and telling us your inspiring story?

Hi! My name is Rachel Millner. I’m a psychologist, single mom by choice to 12-year-old twins, body positive activist, and passionate Peloton rider. I have been a psychologist since 2005 and have specialized in working with people with eating disorders and disordered eating throughout that time. As someone with my own eating disorder history, I am well aware of the impact of diet culture and the focus on thinness and how the lack of body size representation contributes to the start of body hatred and eating disorders. 

Exercise played a big role in my eating disorder. I exercised compulsively for many years and used exercise as punishment. When I began healing from my eating disorder, I realized that my relationship with exercise had to change. I took a long break from movement in order to disentangle it from my eating disorder, and when I was ready to engage in movement again, I discovered Peloton and fell in love with it. I am in a larger body, and one of my frustrations has been that there aren’t bike instructors who have bodies that look like mine. I decided to combine my passion for Peloton, understanding of emotions, knowledge of how important body size diversity is, and my willingness to take up space and be visible, and set out on a mission to get hired as a plus-size Peloton instructor. 

We’d love to learn more about how you got to where you are today.

I am very lucky in that I not only had access to really good therapy, but I am someone who keeps working on things and pushing forward even when things get hard. I kept going through the motions of doing the next thing in front of me, even when I didn’t think things could change, and I found that they did change. I didn’t always believe that my therapist or dietitian could help me, but I showed up for appointments anyway. I learned to challenge the things I was taught as a child that had harmed me and to ignore my inner critic, who was always telling me what I was trying to do wasn’t possible. There are also parts of my identity that made things easier without me doing anything. I’m white, grew up with economic privilege, and had access to supportive learning environments and higher education.

What is a typical day like for you?

My day starts with waking up my kids, feeding them (and the dogs) breakfast, and getting them off to school. I then have time to ride my Peloton before I start working. I see therapy clients and provide supervision to other therapists throughout the day. In between clients, I try to keep up with creating social media content and doing research on Peloton and about different approaches to therapy. After seeing clients all day, I drive my kids to their various sports and after-school activities, take my dogs on a walk, and make sure everyone eats dinner. Depending on the day, I usually watch an episode of a TV show with my kids and tuck them in. I try to practice teaching Peloton every day. Sometimes I am able to do that in the morning after I do my own workout, and sometimes I practice at night after my kids go to bed. I am really lucky that my parents live down the street and are able to help with carpooling, and that I work from home so I can sneak in things like laundry and other chores during the day.

Photo credit: Facebook

If you had one piece of advice for someone just starting out, what would it be?

Don’t decide what’s possible ahead of time. If you try to predict or guess what’s possible, the most likely outcome is that you will limit yourself. There is so much more possible than we are taught to believe. 

Every entrepreneur has a goal and a problem they’re trying to solve. What was the inspiration that started your journey?

I got frustrated with how infrequently I saw bodies that look like mine in fitness spaces. When the only people leading fitness classes are in thin bodies, it sends the message that the only people who are welcome are thin people or those who are trying to get thin. There are barely any examples of people in larger bodies who are accepting of themselves and not trying to change their bodies. I have done so much work on my own healing, and having permission to take up space that I knew I was ready to start trying to solve the problem. Given how much judgment there is of people in larger bodies, it is inevitable that anyone who is in a larger body and using their voice and not apologizing is going to get bullied (especially online). I had to check in with myself and make sure I am ready for that before starting on this journey. Once I realized that my acceptance of myself and my determination to become a Peloton instructor are louder than even the loudest bully, I dedicated myself to getting hired. 

How do you prioritize self-care and well-being while managing the demands of your business?

Community is so important. Especially if you are doing something that goes against the dominant culture. You need people in your life who are going to remind you that the critics are wrong and who will be there for you in the hard moments. It’s also so important to have fun and to laugh. The demands of business and other responsibilities can be stressful and serious, and having fun and laughing makes such a difference in how the day feels. I make it a priority to reach out to someone in my support system every day. Sometimes that’s just a quick text, and other times it’s a longer conversation. Riding my Peloton is a form of self-care for me, and I have it built into my schedule and also have permission to rest if I don’t feel like riding on a particular day. If I decide I need to rest, I will just sit in a reclining chair in my house, set the alarm on my phone for however long I have, and close my eyes. 

What initiatives or actions do you believe are crucial for fostering a more supportive and inclusive business environment for women?

• We have to stop focusing on competition and start building community and trust in our colleagues. Because women haven’t been included in business to the extent men have, women can feel a sense of scarcity and then be in competition with each other. One of our greatest strengths is being able to support one another. That doesn’t mean we don’t go for what we want or speak up when we disagree, but we do those things while also having integrity and valuing the relationship we have with our co-workers. 
• Business environments need to be more creative and flexible and trust their employees. I truly believe that the vast majority of people will work hard and do good work when in an environment that supports them. To me, that means flexible work hours, access to childcare, good health insurance, work from home options whenever possible, etc. 

What would you consider your biggest accomplishment and why?

Deciding to have children on my own and raising my kids has been a huge accomplishment. It’s not only raising them well, it’s raising them differently than I was raised. My parents did the best they could, but they came from generations that focused a lot on thinness and dieting. They grew up with it being normalized to tell your kids to lose weight or put them on diets, so they thought that doing the same when they had kids was a way to protect them. I am so fortunate to have been able to access good therapy and heal from my eating disorder so that I can break the intergenerational trauma and raise kids in an environment in which they don’t have to worry that their bodies will be judged or that food will be restricted. 

Looking back, what have been some of the biggest challenges and obstacles you’ve had to navigate?

Experiencing a life-threatening eating disorder and then later a severe depressive episode. Childhood trauma. My own negative feelings about myself and shame about my body.

Favorite Quote

“Everyone loves butterflies, but I trust the caterpillars more. I trust the ones who know they aren’t done.” – Andrea Gibson

To me, this quote is a reminder that we are all in a continual process of growing and changing. We don’t get to some destination and stop evolving. We are in a constant state of change and evolution throughout our lives, and the people I trust most are the people who know this the most.

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